There are several different types of anxiety. Most anxiety revolves around uncontrollable worrying. When we worry, it stems from fear or anxiety regarding how something will turn out in the end.
For example, if you go on a first date with your crush before the date you worry about how you look, what you will wear, how you should do your hair and make-up, etc.,
During the date, you worry about how you are coming across to your date. Most people want to control the impressions others have of them while dating instead of just enjoying the date and going with the flow.
Anxiety is about wanting to always be in control.
Outcome anxiety is an obsession with outcomes. After the date with your crush, you begin to worry if they like you or not, or when they will call or text you again to ask you on another date.
Outcome anxiety is the inability to just let things be.
The only cure for outcome anxiety is faith, trust in yourself and meditation. I suffered anxiety attacks a few years ago from overwhelming stress from problems in every area of my life. I did not allow myself to heal from my divorce and I got involved with people who took advantage of my weakness and vulnerability.
I started to meditate again. I made it a priority to put myself first! I scheduled meditation time so that I could sit quietly and observe my thoughts. My thoughts were out of control!
What I learned about meditation was that meditation does NOT stop you from thinking. It detaches you from believing every thought that goes through your head.
Anxiety takes place when what we think revolves around our fears and we believe those thoughts and let them wreak havoc on our lives. It starts out mental and then it turns physical as our chest tightens, our heart starts beating out of control and our breathing becomes rapid and shallow.
Meditation allows you to watch your thoughts like your watching a movie. It allows you to be detached from your mind. While doing this you realize you are not your mind and everything you think can’t be taken seriously.
Don’t take your thoughts seriously. Do not think that you can stop yourself from thinking either. Your mind is separate from your being and it will never stop thinking. Don’t try to control your mind, just observe it and only take thoughts that serve you well seriously and let the toxic and fear based thoughts go.
Fear cannot be eliminated from our lives. We feel the fear and do what we have to do anyways. People don’t get over fears, they fight through fears. This takes courage but it’s not impossible. People fight through fears every day. Don’t allow fear to take over your mind because if you do, anxiety will be an everyday part of your life.
Faith can move mountains. Literally! Learning how to have faith has been the most difficult task in my life. I am a very cerebral and intellectual individual and faith requires a level of spiritually I did not easily succumb to. This was to my own detriment. I learned the hard way that I must have faith otherwise anxiety would take it’s place.
Faith is believing good will happen despite your current circumstances.
Faith is trusting the process and believing that despite what happens, it was for the best. Some things are not meant to be and that is okay. Faith is reassurance that regardless if things go left or not, there is a greater plan at work. Faith is looking at the big picture and not allowing the little setbacks we encounter to take us off our mission.
Faith is noticing the negative but not FOCUSING on the negative.
Anxiety outcome requires you to realign your focus to the positive instead of the negative. It doesn’t mean you do not acknowledge negativity as it occurs, it means that you become solution oriented and try to tackle those problems rather than imagining they are bigger than they actually are which induces anxiety.
If you believe you can’t handle pain, uncertainty or disappointment, you will live your entire life within the strong grips of anxiety.
Self-trust is confidence. Confident people believe that despite who rejects them or who leaves them, they are still fabulous and capable of finding love with someone else. Confident people aren’t afraid to role the dice and lose because they don’t focus on loss as an outcome, they focus on winning. If they lose, they shake it off and learn from the experience.
Confident people think positively. They focus on what great things could happen instead of what bad things could happen in any situation.
Do you trust yourself? Do you feel if something goes wrong you will die of despair, heartbreak, and loneliness? Being negative is being dramatic! Somethings just don’t workout, I had to keep repeating this to myself until I believed it.
My life has changed because I make meditation a practice, I have faith good things will happen despite my circumstances and I trust myself enough to know that if the outcome is not as I expected, some things are just not meant to be and something better is coming!
I no longer suffer from anxiety. I let go of the need to control outcomes and whatever shall be, will be. Regardless of any outcome from any situation, I know that I am strong enough to accept it, deal with it and grow from it.
by Janell Hihi Copyright@2017