Can Narcissist Stay In Longterm Relationships?


The short answer is “Yes!”

Narcissist will stay with women who continually accept their abuse by denying it and making excuses for it.

As long as the narcissist is getting a steady source of quality narcissistic supply, he can maintain relationships that last decades.

The ideal victim who the narcissist will choose to be in long term relationship with must never question him, never criticize him and never, ever call out his false self.

Narcissist need their partners to help them maintain their grandiose sense of self by continually complementing them, obeying them and trusting their every word.

The minute you question, criticize or investigate shady behavior from your narcissistic partner is the moment you are disregarded as long term relationship material to the narcissist.

If you’re not robotic, overly optimistic, degradingly submissive and compliant, the relationship will last a few months to a year at the longest.

This doesn’t mean you’re not good relationship material.

This means you have a healthy level of self-esteem and self-respect. It means you leave the table when love and respect is no longer being served.

As long as you accept that it’s his way or the highway, you can maintain a long term relationship with a narcissist! He may even marry you due to your compliant and subservient behavior. As long as you can financially benefit him and you never question his intentions, you’re as good as gold and the relationship can last a lifetime!


A great way to gauge your level of self-esteem is how fast you are able to recognize narcissistic relationships and how fast you are able to leave them!

Never look at a relationship and assume because a couple was together 12 years, they must have a very strong bond. It’s safe to assume they’ve been through a lot together.

It’s important to remember when considering the longevity of narcissistic relationships that it’s the quality of the relationship not the quantity of the years the relationship lasts that should be considered.

Most narcissist never leave a good source of supply. Usually what happens is the codependent partner realizes they are in an abusive relationship and they finally gather the courage to leave the narcissist for good.

The narcissist will stay and play forever, if the victim allows them to. Narcissist favorite line to manipulate their victims to stay with them is:

“We’ve been together all these years, and we’ve been through so much, and you’re just gonna leave?”

The number of years you’re in a relationship is no reason to stay in that relationship. It’s  the quality of those years that determines whether or not one should stay.

Ten years of being with a man in an off again and on again relationship is not ten years of love, loyalty and respect. Instead, it’s ten years of chaos, instability and inconsistency.

The length of time a man stays with a women does not determine how much he loves her. She could be a safe option, a convenience, a financial resource, or an opportunity for a better life.

She could also be a punching bag he can take out all his frustrations on because she is so lost and codependent, the fear of being alone is worse than being in an abusive relationship.

As long as you can live your life constantly being labeled a drama queen and accepting your narcissistic partner as the victim of your alleged paranoia, insecurity and jealousy… you will be able to maintain a long term relationship with a narcissist.

If you’re reading this because you left a narcissist before you could define the relationship as long-term, good for you!

If you’re reading this wondering how your narcissistic ex lover is now in a long term relationship with another women, remember it’s the women who determines how long she will tolerate narcissistic abuse.

Better her than you!

You’re worth is not determined by how long your relationships last. It’s determined by your ability to walk away from abusive and toxic relationships.

By Janell Hihi @Copyright 2018


4 thoughts on “Can Narcissist Stay In Longterm Relationships?

  1. I have a 9 months old baby with my ex but u decided to leave him becos i couldn’t tolerate his narcisstist behaviour and he went on with his new supply and ignored the existance of his child. Happily posting happy moments with his new supply and the new supply i suspected have some form of disorder as well because she knows about me and outrageously wanted to stick with my baby’s father and declared LOVE to the whole world on her social media and properly showing to me they are happily together and thought that she won the battle but she did not realised that i am the one who choose to leave this toxic rs. I have exposed my narcissist ex behavious on social media and this new supply backed him up and reply saying he is the best bf ever and an amazing lover regardless of what he did and its only one side of the story and that the story is not true etc.. obviously he have told her and his frds another story as usual how a narcissist will do.
    My question here is i no longer have any hate on this person as i have recovered and got over him zero feeling left for such kind of human being but my concern is my child she is still very young and i feel she deserved child support from his father. My question is does narcissist cool off? Will he put on things behind and consider that it’s his kid and help with the expenses? Will they forgive and forget.or how to make them maintain a good cordial relationship when coparenting. fyi he did not ask or visited his child for 5 months already since we separated. Any way i can manipulate narcissist or make them reply or help with the support. If not i will just have to go thru the legal way and get things enforced. What are you advise?


  2. Yes they can… I was married to mine for almost 8 years, together a total of 11. In that time he had affairs lasting almost as long. But I’m free and thay, along with his current legitimate gf are still prisoners of the most dishonest man I have ever met.


  3. The above comment by “Deb Codding” was posted by Kim Barwick. She is welcome to post her thoughts using her own name. It is understandable that she is angry and bitter, but harassing the women surrounding the man she can’t have in any legitimate way by posting comments or making fake profiles or calling/texting people representing herself as another person is not “telling the truth” but playground bully behavior. If she is truly happy with the man as she claims, she would instead, invest that energy into enjoying living in the moment and not worry about what he does when he CHOOSES not to be with her.


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