Never date men in financial hardship.
You might be thinking it’s unfair to judge people. You might be thinking that desiring a financially stable man is selfish of you. You may even go as far as labeling yourself a gold digger just because you prefer men who know how to manage a checkbook, have their own home, car, and investments.
Society will make you feel bad for having standards that you require men to meet.
First of all, men who are trying to get their finances in order are not in the position to truly desire a real relationship. Most men who don’t have their lives together are just looking for fun. Sure, they may settle for women who may be less desirable to them in the meantime but as soon as they are able to get out of their financial rut, they will leave you and pursue the women who wouldn’t give them the time of day while he was living in his sister’s basement.
Stop being overly accommodating to men. Stop being so understanding. Men take that for granted. They crave tough love. Give it to them or they will seek it elsewhere.
Of course, there’s the male gold diggers who marry women who sacrifice financially against their better judgement. He uses her until there’s nothing else to take from her, then he finds another sugar momma with a lucrative job and a tendency to feel sorry for grown men.
Quality men don’t want women feeling sorry for them. They want to work for a women’s love and prove themselves as worthy providers.
Men who are in financial hardship actually lose respect for women who accept their mediocre circumstances. He’s not grateful that you lowered your standards to be with him. In fact, he loses respect for you that you didn’t choose better for yourself. He looks at you as if you are desperate and you’ll accept anything.
When a man loses respect for you, his attraction for you wanes. Respect will always trump love. Sure, he will play the part that he’s mystified by your beauty and kindness for accepting his circumstances so that he can extract sex and 50/50 dates with you.
However, in the end, you get left. He wants the women that has high standards and the backbone not to settle for him. It motivates him to work harder and be better… a women’s resistance of a man is his best motivator. Accepting him with all his flaws lessens his motivation to change and improve his life. Don’t accept his financial issues. Instead, tell him when he gets his own place and his finances together to contact you. And trust me, your rejection will motivate him to fix his finances and he will reach out once he’s back on his feet. If you accept him as he is, you represent complacency, not growth. Men want progression and forward movement.
Never think being nice will keep a man. The nicer you are the more you’ll be taken for granted. It’s not normal to be nice all the time and it’s definitely not being authentic…
Lowering your standards lowers your value. Do yourself a favor and don’t do a man any favors by accepting less than what you deserve. Trust me when I tell you he won’t appreciate love out of pity. Eventually he will effortlessly discard it. Be a goal he has to reach, not the “In the meantime” chick!