Narcissistic Repellent: Good Listeners Can Never Be Manipulated

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If you listen closely to what people say, how they say it and the words they choose to convey the message they are trying to deliver, you will immediately understand the pivotal art of discernment between facts and fiction.

It is wise to listen and paraphrase immediately after a statement is made, particularly after you’ve had an interaction with a narcissist.

Narcissist sugar coat, generalize, deflect and minimize important issues into casual, unimportant and dismissive conversations so that the other party in the interaction feels crazy for even asking, insinuating or bringing up a matter that appears important to them.

It is absolutely essential to quiet your emotions and your resistance when interacting with a narcissist so that you handle the interaction like an attorney rather than an emotional counterpart.

Narcissist lack human emotion and empathy so interacting with them from an emotional perspective will serve you no leverage whatsoever.

Approach the narcissist like they are your business partner, not your lover. For example, ask direct question, “Why did you tell me you would pay the phone bill but you didn’t?”

The narcissist will respond, “You never told me to pay the bill, you asked me if I would and I never gave you a direct answer. The problem is you always make assumptions and put unrealistic expectations one me. Why didn’t you just tell me to pay the bill?”

Before you act emotionally, dissect what the narcissist just said carefully.

“You never told me to pay the bill, you asked me.”

This is a deflection, if you respond to a deflection it will bring you down an unproductive rabbit hole. Do not respond to that statement.

“The problem is you always making assumptions.” 

This is the narcissist attempt to deflect the responsibility on you. Another form of deflection which does not deserve a respond.

“You always put unrealistic expectations on me.”

This is an accusation not rooted in reality which is another form of deflection. Do not take the bait! Do not respond to this statement directly.

“Why didn’t you just ask me to pay the bill?”

This is the ultimate form of deflection. A manipulative person who dodges personal responsibility puts the nail in the coffin when they ask a question that deflects blame from them to you. If and when you answer, you officially took the bait and you will find yourself explaining yourself instead of them explaining why they didn’t do what they were supposed to do.

So how do you respond when you can’t respond to anything they said because it’s full of deflective statements and questions?

You don’t respond to anything the narcissist said.

You simply re-ask the same question you originally asked. Using the example above you would ask, once again… “Why didn’t you pay the phone bill after you agreed to pay it?”

The narcissist will then accuse you of deflecting by not responding to their original statements. Don’t take the bait!

Instead, ask them to pay the bill now by saying, “Can you pay the bill right now?”

One of two things will happen, they will get angry and storm off or they will defend their stance by stating they never agreed to pay the bill so their not paying.

Either way, you probably won’t win if your dealing with a narcissist but you will certainly not have to defend yourself against something they did. In this case, I’d pay the bill and move on with my life… Without the narcissist in it!

Do you need help leaving a narcissist? I am a survivor of narcissistic abuse and I will be happy to listen to your story and give advice. One 35 minute, confidential call for only $14.95. Sign up Today!

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By Janell Hihi @copyright 2017

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If It’s Meant to Be it Will Be? Or If You Want It, Go Get It?

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I believe when people say, “If it’s meant to be it will be,” they use it as a cliche’ cop-out.

It’s a way for people who refuse to grow and admit the truth to rationalize everything in life from break ups, getting fired, not getting a job, not closing a deal, etc.,

They get an easy out without going into depth about why they really left, how they didn’t put in enough work to keep their job or how they failed to close a deal because their weak follow up game.

Not wanting to be the bearer of bad news by just being honest with themselves and others is what keeps passive people spewing out that toxic phrase.

It’s an incredibly rude and insensitive thing to say to people who are going through hard times. No one wants to hear, “Sorry for your loss, he’s in a better place now.” After someone you love dies.

Like, really? How would you know if it’s a better place? Have you been there? Fuck out my face!

Or when you get divorced or have a miscarriage passive people say, “It just wasn’t meant to be.” Trying to process a loss and hearing those 6 gut wrenching words is not okay.

Instead say something like, “I am so sorry, I am here if you need anything,” Is more socially acceptable.

Saying, “Well, it just wasn’t meant to be” is a positive indication of a person who lacks personal responsibility. Instead of just saying I chose the wrong partner or I was always late to work because I never planned ahead, is being honest with yourself and others.

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It’s not that it wasn’t meant to be, you just didn’t want it bad enough. And that’s okay. Let’s just be adults and keep it real. Miss me with that tired ass phrase lazy people use to dodge responsibility.

Recently, I wrote an article regarding why I hate passive, beta males.

Men who confuse chasing with pursuing, and have major insecurities that give them a timid and hesitant demeanor that most woman I’ve surveyed find very unattractive.

This article is somewhat of a general follow up. I would like to pose this question to my readers:

Are you more likely to say If it’s meant to be it will be?  or Are you more likely to use the phrase, If you want it go get it?”

If you are more likely to say “If it’s meant to be it will be,” You take a more passive and reserved approach to life in general. This is not a bad thing. It just means you believe in the universe, fate, the flow and what is meant to be yours will fall into your lap.

This fate based approach to life has its pros and cons.

You may not be very good in sales. Ambitious people don’t believe if it’s meant to be it will be. They just manifest and make things happen.

Similar to people who complain about being single but don’t take initiative to go out and meet people. They believe the right person will come when it’s meant for them to come and they don’t have to put in any effort to get out the house and meet new people.

This doesn’t mean they beat a dead horse. It means they do the work to show interest, build and develop and if it all falls apart they are not discouraged. Go getters get up and try again, improving their approach and technique. They don’t sulk in resentment and self-pity.

A go getter will never be left contemplating the question, “What if I did more?” or “What if I showed her that I cared in more ways?” Nah. Assertive, ambitious people try and exercise all possibilities before giving up.

That’s why when they walk away they are not sad and depressed. They feel good because they did everything they could. A beta male or fateful person walks away before the chapter is finished.

Chasing someone is pursuing someone who is showing you zero interest. They constantly cancel dates, respond to text messages 24 to 48 hours later, and when they finally meet with you they are inattentive, late and mentally absent. Go getters don’t pursue people who show zero interest. They move on.

Go getters want a return on their investment. Go with the flow, passive people want the other person to do all the work. That’s the fundamental difference.

The go getter at work follows up on leads daily, the passive, “If it’s meant to be it will be,” individual calls the lead once, never follows up and doesn’t care.

They don’t “force,” sales. Whatever the hell that is supposed to mean. Their tiny paychecks is proof of their dependence on the Universe to deliver. Sad!

Passive individuals may hold back when they should move forward boldly and confidently. Taking initiative to them makes them feel like they are being pushy and pressuring other people.

Passive people easily go along with other’s agenda’s because other people’s efforts makes them feel secure.

The major issue with this approach is you may base your efforts on the other persons efforts that your involved with.

If they don’t compliment you, then you won’t compliment them. If they don’t text you first, you won’t text them ever again. If they don’t ask you to hang out, you won’t ask them to hang out.

If they don’t go down on you, then you won’t go down on them. Sex with passive people sucks! They are too dependent on what you do and how much you show you care before they make any moves on their own.

It’s borderline codependent. Yet, they think taking a backseat to everything all the time makes them appear strong and confident. Nah, they look like pussies.

If you want it go get it!

The freedom in this phrase is undeniable. Do we get everything we go after? No! But do we learn a ton in the process? Yes!

The fruit of knowledge is in the journey not in the destination.

The number one regret on the death beds of many is that they regret they didn’t follow their dreams and love harder!

Who wants to live their lives everyday knowing that they are pre-destined to a certain fate and they can’t do anything about it but let it play out?

Not me! That’s a delusional way to live. Free will and choice does play a part to a certain extent. The only time it doesn’t is when people are faced with systematic oppression and that’s another blog.

They didn’t pay enough attention, show enough affection and they didn’t risk enough to win! They never reconciled differences, resolved grudges nor did they have the courage to ask those they’ve hurt for forgiveness.

Nothing risked, nothing gained. Is your soul’s bank account drained?

What approach do you take and why? Please comment below, “like” and share.

Namaste

J. Hihi Copyright@2017

When a Narcissist Insults you or Tries to Bait You With An Argument, Do This!

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Narcissists don’t talk, or communicate: they fend off, hide and evade” Sam Vaknin

Narcissist are insidious manipulators. They can get under your skin by disguising insults, giving you compliments with sadistic smirks on their face, or suddenly start ignoring you for no reason.

The narcissist craves for you to ask them, “Why are you acting strange, what’s wrong?”

Just so they can reply with, “Nothing!” And a shoulder shrug to dismiss themselves before you start asking more questions.

Narcissist want unsolved problems to exist within their relationships because it fuels the toxic environment that will eventually strip away your virtues, your patience, and inner peace.

The narcissist wishes to keep their victim in an anxious state. They never want you to be able to calculate or predict their next attack on you.

If you are in a state of anxiety with a narcissist and can’t seem to find your way out of the fog, I have a solution.

Everything the narcissist says and does is bait to drag you down further into their inner hell.

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Fight back with the 6 proven techniques below:

  1. Remain Unreactive: Act as if you didn’t see what they did or hear what they said. Act completely oblivious. They may try harder to bait you for a reaction but keep acting as if you don’t notice and remain unbothered. To release your pain confide in a close friend or family member. Just don’t give the narc the satisfaction of seeing you sad.
  2. Answer every question with a question: This will annoy anyone, especially a narcissist. If a narcissist asks you a demeaning question, never, ever, answer it. Ask them why they asked that question? Then ask them what answer do they expect? Then ask them what motivated them to ask the question? Then ask them why they are asking so many questions. But never, answer the original question. This way, the narcissist is stuck explaining why they asked you a question and you stay unengaged, and you don’t take the bait.
  3. When the narcissist gives you the silent treatment write them letters. Write the letter very sloppy so they don’t understand a single word written. Leave some of the letters on sticky notes and stick them to the fridge or bathroom mirror. Sooner or later they will ask what the hell you wrote in the letter and shazam! The silent treatment is broken. If you don’t live with them, send them a letter in the mail with sloppy handwriting and keep quiet until they ask you about the letter. This works like a charm! If they still ignore you, ignore them back and focus on yourself. Catch up with your friends, hang out and keep posting all your fun pictures on social media. He will realize sooner rather than later the silent treatment isn’t going to work on you.
  4. When they blatantly insult you reply with “Oh stop, you don’t even believe that.” Say it calmly and with a smile. Walk away from the confrontation or quickly change the topic to something more positive. Throw in a goal you just reached or even compliment them with how great they look. Another tactic to use when they verbally abuse you is to compliment them. Instead of insulting them back, give them a compliment for every insult they hurl at you. This will disarm them and throw them off balance. Say the compliments with a sincere loving tone and watch what happens! The narcissist will try harder or storm off to get away from you.
  5. When the narcissist gaslights you and calls you crazy, respond by saying the most annoying questions of all times… “I know you are, but what am I?” If you follow the steps above, it should never get to the point where the narc is able to successfully gaslight you because you’re no longer taking their bait. You can also respond to them calling you crazy by saying, “You know, you’re right. In fact, I just booked an appointment with a psychologist and may get on some meds.” Then ask him what medications he thinks you should try and what mental conditions he thinks you may have… Manic depression? Bipolar? Extreme paranoia? Keep asking him his expert advice on your so-called mental issues as mockery. But act sincerely like you agree that you are crazy and need professional help. Go as far as really booking an appointment with a psychologist on the terms that he has to go to your appointments with you. Watch the reaction. Suddenly, you won’t be so crazy after all.
  6. Never react and never get defensive. Disengage your emotions and respond to the narcissist with tact, strategy, and deflection. Never defend abuse, never explain yourself, always counterattack with clever techniques.

Try the 6 steps above and comment below to share your success story. This works! I’ve done it time and time again with narcissist family members and co-workers. If the narcissist becomes violent, seek help immediately. Leave and then contact the authorities.

Fight back against narcissist abuse by ultimately leaving the narcissist for good. Narcissist never change. It’s them, not you! Get out and do it fast!

By Janell Hihi

Copyright@2017

When Your Husband Resents Taking Care of You: The Silent Abuse Stay at Home Mother’s Endure.

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The share of mothers who do not work outside the home rose to 29% in 2012, up from a modern-era low of 23% in 1999, according to a new Pew Research Center analysis of government data.

Stay at home mothers is on the rise again. Considering the cost of daycare, women are left with no other choice.

I recently hosted a baby shower for my niece and of course, when women get together, we talk! The conversation started out between me and two of my sisters, and as others overheard the topic, they began to chime in.

The dialogue was both informative and emotional. Complaints turned into tears and stories were shared among all women involved from various age groups. We were underappreciated, undervalued and disrespected at some point in our lives for being stay at home mothers.

It’s as if men can’t seem to make up their minds if they want miss independent or a caring stay at home mother who makes her family her job.

We came to the conclusion that most men want both. We also came to the conclusion that we are trying to live up to that unrealistic fairytale and we are damn near killing ourselves in the process.

Where do we draw the line? 

The berated stay at home mom syndrome is a silent, insidious abuse that many women endure on a daily basis.

This type of abuse is a sensitive subject because in most cases, the financially dependent women who is at home taking care of the kids is afraid to speak out because her livelihood depends on it.

She knows if she speaks up or gets out of line, her man who keeps threatening to leave will actually leave. The fear of him leaving her out in the cold with no job or resources usually keeps her tongue in knots. Nothing silences a woman more than fear.

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Some men use their financial power over stay at home mothers to abuse them. They do this by constantly pointing out that the stay at home mother has no job, therefore she has no say so, and no power to make any substantial decisions in the relationship.

Financial abuse is abuse, plain and simple. A man does not have to put his hands on you to abuse you. Instead, he can use his mind to manipulate you, shame you, and put you in a situation where you are continuously pregnant, at home and unable to work, just so he can berate you and blame you for being unemployed and not contributing “Financially.”

The mere act of a woman staying home to raise her children saves the family money instantly. Homemade meals, no daycare bills and decreased anxiety most working parents experience is more than a contribution within itself.

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Forced Family

In this situation, the woman is essentially pregnant every other year of the relationship, ensuring that she will never have the chance to return to work. Depending on her earning power, with the birth of each child, the cost of childcare makes it impossible to return to work.

To really know a man’s character, depend on him for something and see how he reacts! Does he willingly help with entusiasm? Or is he reluctant and makes a comment about how much he loves “Independent” women?

Some men go so far as to call stay at home mothers lazy!

If you ever sat at home with an infant and a toddler, you would know that taking care of children 24/7 is the most exhausting work in the world.

When a stay at home mom wants to vent to you, give her your undivided attention and listen. Stay at home mom’s live with a guilt influenced by society but mainly the man who works day in, and day out, and comes home complaining that she doesn’t have a job.

Imagine being a woman and feeling guilty about staying home and raising your kids while your man is at work? Imagine feeling worthless for being a parent? Now imagine being called lazy for taking care of your children and running your own household?

Most stay at home moms suffering from financial abuse believe that they should feel “Lucky,” to have the privilege to stay at home despite the fact that they are being called lazy and living under highly critical and controlling circumstances.

They feel as if they don’t deserve to complain just because they are not working. This couldn’t be further from the truth. I keep hearing these women say, “Well, he works hard to provide for me so I can’t really complain when he get’s frustrated and yells at me.”

When abuse is justified by the victim, it’s very sad to listen to.

Beware of the man who NEVER appears to be satisfied.

Financially abusive men cannot comprehend the meaning of a partnership. Their understanding of a marriage is elementary. They believe building a life with someone is equivalent to finding a roommate in college. He believes what’s mines is mines and what’s yours is yours. This separatist ideology is the reason this type of man has a hard time maintaining relationships.

If a married man feels like his wife and kids are “living off of him,” he hasn’t quite grasped the concept that the “I” turns into a “We” when he decides to start a family. 

The same man who complains that his wife is living off of him, is the same man who appears to be overly protective of his children. When the wife offers to update her resume’ and start looking for a job, all of a sudden her husband has a problem with daycares.

He asks, “Who will be taking care of my children while you’re at work? I don’t trust daycares!” 

Of course, his confusing, contradicting demands leave her feeling hopeless and unable to find a solution to her husband’s incessant bitching and complaining.

To ensure that he maintains control over his wife, the financially abusive man will purposely get his wife pregnant again as soon as she starts to look for a job. This ensures that if she is offered a job, she will have to quit eventually when the baby is born or go on maternity leave.

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“Every Penny Spent Is A Penny Tracked

Every penny, and I mean every penny must be accounted for when given to the woman in this relationship. If it cannot be accounted for then the emotional and even physical abuse ensues and consequences are handed out. This may involve being given less money for basic necessities or being forced to beg for money. The feeling of being trapped in the house with no money for gas, food or transportation is crippling and women in this type of relationship stick to this rule or they know they will suffer the consequences.” By Ginger Dean.

The stay at home mom lives in confusion and spends many sleepless nights lying awake trying to make sense of the endless contradictions. Her man was loving and supportive when he expressed his interest in building a big family together. He even told her he wants her to be the type of mother who raises her own kids. He wanted a wife who took pride in her role as a mother and homemaker and who kept the house clean and cooked a homemade dinner every night.

However, when he found out his fairytale would soon be shattered by the reality that on some days, despite her being home with the kids all day long, the house would still be messy, and sometimes ordering a pizza was all she had the energy to do. When he realized she would suffer from depression, be in a bad mood when he got home on certain occasions or wanted to meet her friends for happy hour on a Tuesday evening after he came home from work, is when he began to complain.

Taking care of the house and caring for the kids is not a real job to most men. As a result of this kind of backward thinking, many men feel resentful for fitting the bill for their entire household. But wait, isn’t that the man’s role? Or is it both parent’s role to provide financially and take care of the kids equally?

I noticed that generational cultural changes have given women more opportunities than ever to work and also provide for their families. However, it appears men still want to hold on to gender roles based upon the ideology of Patriarchy too. In other words, they want their cake and eat it too.

So, when it’s time to pay the bills he wants an “Independent women,” but when it’s time to wash the dishes, give Charlie a bath and take Melissa to gymnastics, he wants a woman who takes pride in performing the duties as a mother!

Men today want women to work full-time and pay half of the bills, be an awesome mother who does most of the parenting which includes taking time off work to take the kids to doctor appointments, soccer practice, and birthday parties.

He also wants her to make it home in time to prepare a healthy, homecooked meal, give the kiddos a bath, help them with their homework and tuck them into bed by 8:30pm while he gets to chill on the sofa with a beer after he gets off of work.

That doesn’t appear fair to me at all! Ladies, most of you are getting played trying to do everything. Learn how to delegate responsibilities and make everything 50/50. That includes household chores and tending to the children.

It’s no wonder, women are dying of heart disease and heart attacks at an alarming rate, now more than ever in history!

The stay at home mom is literally verbally attacked when she stands up for herself and asks for a break from the children. Many men say things like, “You need a break from what? You don’t have a job, you stay at home all day with the kids.”

Many men have the audacity to say that they are being used because they have to pay all the bills. Perhaps they should do more research and look up the prices of daycare for 2 or 3 children. Most Americans would spend their entire salary on daycare if there were not women willing to stay home and raise their kids.

If you are suffering from stay at home mom “Financial Spousal Abuse,” you are not alone. Many women are suffering in silence. Verbal and mental abuse is unacceptable. If you are fed up for being held to unrealistic expectations 24/7, switch it up!

Get a job if you can, get back your independence and watch as your man sulks in envy. The contradictory behavior will continue. As soon as you start working hard on a job and somewhat slacking as a parent, your man will start to complain that all you do is work and you don’t pay attention to your kids.

You will never win with some men… there will always be some taste of dissatisfaction on his bitter tongue. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t!

The unappreciative man will remain unappreciative. He will always find the place in which you lack because he fails to realize perfection will never be accomplished. Ask yourself, is this the kind of man you want to spend the rest of your life with?

I am currently writing a book “The 52 Laws of Maintaining Power in Relationships,” and the most powerful law in the book is to ALWAYS maintain financial independence. In other words, don’t become a stay at home mom unless you know for sure your man will be supportive of it.

Plan ahead and save money before the baby comes so if you need to leave, you can do so without fear of falling into poverty. Being a stay at home mom should be temporary. Never, under any circumstances be a stay at home mom for years on years with an unappreciative, immature man!

He will leave you! Mark my words. To maintain power, attraction, and independence in a relationship, you MUST always have your own money.

Never marry a man who doesn’t understand the meaning of a partnership. If he believes that maintaining his financial independence and personal aims and ambitions is above providing for his family, run towards the nearest exit!

Namaste

By Janell Hihi Copyright@2017

 

The Narcissist Favorite Victims: 4 Most Codependent Zodiac Signs

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In a recent article, I pointed out the top narcissistic signs in the Zodiac. This article will do the opposite by listing the 4 most codependent Zodiac signs. The narcissist purposely seeks codependent people because they are the perfect victim to prey upon.

The codependent has low self-esteem, a huge need for validation and a glitch that makes them give and give while accepting very little in return. Codependents accept non-reciprocal relationships and narcissist are inherently incapable of reciprocation which makes these two a match made in heaven.

What does it mean to be codependent?

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#1 Codependent Zodiac Sign: CANCER

Cancers are excellent caregivers. They also make great parents. Their willingness to nurture those around them with love, support, and attention can allow the Cancer to easily be used, abused and manipulated.

The nursery rhyme, “Mary had a Little Lamb,” is a great example of how Cancer’s follow their love interest hopefully and blindly. Mary’s little lamb is the symbolic representation of a Cancer and how they operate in relationships. They like to revolve around their partner.

The narcissist is immediately attracted to the Cancers parental-like characteristic because the narcissist had an abusive or an emotionally unavailable parent as a child. The narcissist wants to feel loved and supported and the Cancer is the only sign who eagerly gives love and attention unconditionally.

The problem with most Cancers is that they don’t know where to draw the line. They give and give and then become resentful. They give selflessly just so they can cry their favorite line, “But I gave you everything!” The Cancer’s dark side is to be a martyr like most water signs. Cancer’s want to be the one to sacrifice it all just to complain and whine about it incessantly.

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The victim role is their favorite role. They purposely attract people into their life who will abuse them, just so they can feed their emotional turmoil and depression. Like, most co-dependents, Cancers manifest toxic relationships into their life believing they can fix the other person. This never works, and the Cancer is always hurt in the end. Never learning from their mistakes.

Cancer’s capitalize off their sadness. The rapper 50 Cent got shot five times yet continuously brags about his so-called immortality in his rap lyrics. Cancer’s don’t share their testimony of their hardships and struggles to be a beacon of light for others. Instead, they use it solidify their proud role as the victim. They want you to know what happened to them. They want you to know how other people went out of their way to hurt them.

Cancer is one of the most intuitive and clairvoyant zodiac signs but they rarely act on their instincts. This is what makes the Cancer so puzzling and hard to figure out.

Cancer, like Pisces and Scorpio, can vacillate between being a codependent and a narcissist. After all, they are two sides of the same coin. They can play both roles simultaneously throughout their lives. However, they are more likely to be the co-dependent than the narcissist. Pisces however, is the only water sign with more narcissistic traits.

One thing you will never, ever hear, is a Cancer taking responsibility for their pain. Instead, they say sadistic things like, “It’s my fault,” or “Everyone thinks I’m worthless.” They want pity more than they want respect. FACTS! The narcissist preys on this desire and usually strings along a Cancer for decades inflicting varying levels of abuse onto them.

How Cancers can heal from narcissistic abuse:

Cancers can use their emotions to heal from narcissistic abuse. Narcissist hate emotions. They don’t want to feel because they are numb from the abuse they endured as a child. The cancer must learn to cut off their nurturing side and feel the toxic emotions and turmoil that the narcissist in inflicting upon them. When Cancers internalize the toxic emotions caused by the narcissist, they will gather the strength to leave.

Cancers must retreat into their shell, go “No Contact,” on the narcissist and “Feel” their way out of love with the toxic narcissistic. Once the Cancer comes out of hiding, their mind and heart will be clear, precise and all-knowing. They will leave the narcissist because they will finally realize that the narc is completely incapable of reciprocating  unconditional love.

#2 Gemini

 

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Gemini’s have a child-like innocence to them that makes them somewhat naive. Narcissist prey on their naivety. The optimistic Gemini wants to see the best in others to their own detriment. Gemini’s typically don’t believe what is being shown to them in front of their own eyes until it’s too late.

Gemini is the astrological child of the zodiac. Children are often victimized because they don’t know any better. With age, Gemini’s tend to harden and become more skeptical after they’ve been burned 6 or 7 times.

However, while in their younger years, Gemini’s will often be targeted by narcissist. It is vital that Gemini’s study psychology and become keenly aware of their intuitive abilities at a very young age to prevent becoming prey to narcissism.

Gemini’s must learn to trust their inner voice and avoid situations that can take them off the course of their divine purpose. Like a child, Gemini is very curious and experimental. Their desire to wonder off and try new things makes it very easy for narcissist to take the Gemini out of her comfort zone and into new territory almost effortlessly.

Gemini is a mutable sign, which means that they are flexible and can easily adapt to any situation. The narcissist will take the Gemini on a rollercoaster ride of toxic and euphoric emotions and the Gemini will easily adapt. The Gemini must learn how to stand firm and not just go with the flow. This easy going demeanor they inherently inhabit is what get’s them in trouble.

Gemini is the child of the zodiac and is naturally care-free, avoiding major responsibility and using cleverness to get out of the binds they put themselves in. They will depend on others easily like a child and therefore become codependent in a rather innocent and naive way.

The Gemini will try to “Talk it out,” with the narcissistic using their excellent communication skills, blatant honesty and logic to resolve issues with the narcissist until they realize that trying to reason with a narcissist is like trying to nail jello to a tree. It never works. When the Gemini realizes they can’t talk out their problems with a narcissist, they will begin to slip away and prepare to leave the narc behind.

How Gemini’s can heal from narcissism:

Gemini’s are highly gifted artistically. Mostly in writing, song, lyrical composition and speech. The Gemini should write, sing, rap and create stories to heal from narcissistic abuse. Drawing and painting may help too.

Gemini’s get too caught up in the way people make them feel. One of my favorite Gemini’s Lauren Hill, had a hook on one of her songs that sums up the Gemini’s dilemma, “When it hurts so bad, why does it feel so good?”

Feelings are overrated. However, Gemini judges 80% of their relationships with others based on high chemistry and feelings which are both unsustainable, unreliable and do not determine long-term relationship success.

What the Gemini will learn from dealing with a narcissist is to be less mutable and more fixed when it comes to allowing people to come into their lives and sweep them off their feet. They will learn that when something seems to good to be true, it is usually is. The Gemini will begin to shed their naivety and look at things more skeptically. Although in their child-like minds, full of optimism, wonder, and hope, they will always be more inclined to look at the bright side of people, and the world in general.

The narcissist will hate the fact that they can never, ever steal away the happiness and joy of the Gemini. Their bright beautiful souls are there owns for the keeping. Gemini’s will bounce back from narcissistic abuse like no other Zodiac sign can.

#3 Sagittarius

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Sagittarius have big hearts. This is especially true for the women, not so much the man. Sagittarius is ruled by the planet Jupiter. The largest planet in our solar system. What’s so special about Jupiter is that not only is its size but it’s ability to eat up comets that could destroy other planets.

Jupiter gobbles up planets and large meteors to protect other planets and that is exactly what the optimistic, charismatic, fun-loving Sagittarius does on a daily basis for other people.

The narcissist gravitates towards the bubbly Sagittarius with a strong magnetic force. Narcissist are energy vampires and Sagittarius naturally possess a ton of energy the narcissist can feed upon.

The Sagittarius will give and give until it dawns on them that they are being taken advantage of.

When the Sagittarius realizes they are being taken for a ride, the Sagittarius will take action. Sagittarius is a mutable fire sign which they can easily adapt and handle change. Most Sagittarius will confront the narcissist directly with cutting words that will unmask the narcissist.

At that point, the Sagittarius is aware of the narcissist game and she will begin to enact revenge or leave altogether. Leaving will be very hard for her and it is likely to be drawn out for several years.

She will cheat, fight back, inflict abuse and still continue to love the narcissist because of her inability to see a negative situation for exactly what it is.

The Sagittarius optimism can blind her. The Narcissist uses her positive attitude as a tool to keep her hoping and wishing things will be better.

Sagittarius love the idea of love and they get blindsided by the fairytale instead of paying attention to the nightmare that is unfolding in front of them. They love affection, attention, and validation.

Sagittarius needs to feel secure in a relationship. They do whatever they can to solidify that security. The narcissist uses this against them and dangles a carrot in front of the Sag face just to enjoy the chase.

A narcissist cannot possess a negative, overly critical person. This is why narcissist never gets very far with Virgo’s. Although Virgo’s make up some of the most famous comedians in the world, they have a critical eye that can see the flaws in a person or relationship almost immediately. That is what protects the Virgo. The Sagittarius will benefit from a Virgo friend or parent who can help them gather the strength to leave the narcissist for good. 

It’s simple. By using their mutable gifts to transcend beyond the pain of abuse and turn it into power and courage to move on. 

#4 Aries 

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If you look up the definition of codependency in an online dictionary, a picture of an Aries female will appear.

Aries put love over EVERYTHING. This is both an extraordinary gift and a life-altering curse.

Aries is the ride or die chick the narcissist dreams of possessing. She loves unconditionally. She forgives easily because like a good little codependent she takes the blame for everything the narcissist does to her.

“Maybe I should of lost weight and he wouldn’t have cheated,” Aries says things like that. They will blame their mother, their best friend and even their child for abuse caused by the narcissist just so they can hold on to their relationship for dear life!

Aries is the first sign of the Zodiac. Their astrological age is the infant. It is scientifically proven that infants need love, touch, and affection to survive and thrive.

Aries needs love to survive. Literally! They are pure, innocent, adorable and incredibly open to learning with a spark of curiosity, wonder and genius.

Aries are blessed with being both highly intelligent and artistic. I know, it’s not fair. But who could be mad at them, they are like cute, tiny little infants that we want to hold close and spoil.

Aries loves to be spoiled and the narcissist will love-bomb the Aries and completely sweep her off of her feet in the honeymoon stage of the relationship. The Aries will fall in love fast and furious with the narcissist.

When he begins to show his true colors, the Aries would rather live in denial than face the truth that they got played. The narcissist had his mask on and now it’s off. The Aries continues to believe it’s her fault and she spends every moment trying to figure out what she did wrong and why all of a sudden she is unworthy of his love.

Aries is a Cardinal, fire signs so they will confront the narcissist directly with no filters. However, they will never get the truth. Aries are raw and honest individuals and they can’t quite comprehend why they don’t get direct answers from narcissist when they ask them direct questions.

The Aries will react hostile and in some cases even violently to the narcissistic abuse. The problem is she won’t take corrective action. She only reacts emotionally, not strategically. The narcissist is able to play her like a string because of it.

Corrective action is leaving the narcissist. She won’t leave easily. It will take years or even decades of abuse for her to gather the courage to leave someone she loves because she truly believes she needs this man to survive. Expect the police to be called often because Aries is confrontational.

She may do something out of anger to retaliate against her abuser that could land her in prison. She will make the mistake of neglecting her kids, her friends, her family and her health to be with the man she loves. There are no boundaries. Her harshest lesson is that love is NOT sacrifice. Love is a mutual exchange of energy, respect, honesty, and effort.

How can Aries heal from narcissistic abuse?

Aries is a leader. She is a natural born go-getter. If she summons up her determination to leave the narcissist, she can leave without hesitation for good. She has the power to never look back. People gravitate to her fire, she is a warmth comfort to many on a cold night. There are worthy people waiting to receive her love with total devotion and reciprocity.

If you have a sun or moon sign in any of the signs above, be strong and be brave. Do not let your love and light be taken for granted. It is because you have so much of it, those deprived of it, purposely seek you out.

By Janell Hihi Copyright@2017

 

 

Single Mother’s Targeted as Easy Prey

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I wrote an article Is he dating you to get to your child? about this topic as it pertains to children of single moms prey for pedophiles and abuse from their mother’s boyfriend. It is imperative to understand how selective you must be in who you allow into your home and around your child.

In this article, I want to focus on how men prey on a single woman as easy to sleep with, easy to use and easy to manipulate.

I’m astonished by the men I meet who think that they are about to just instantly get invited into my home, regardless if my child is home, and sleep with me… I don’t know them from the cat down the street and they think they are coming into my home which I share with my child? Never.

Regardless if your single from being divorced or a single parent from having a child out of wedlock, you are vulnerable to abuse.

Men who don’t have kids and date woman with kids may or may not have bad intentions but I will say most single men with no kids don’t want to seriously date women with kids. Typically, they just want sex. Single men see single mothers as easy to sleep with because they equate being a single mother with being desperate.

Most of the time, these men will sleep with single mothers, until they find something they deem better and leave for good. They typically will not ask about her children or ask to meet them. They typically show signs early in the dating process that they just want sex, somewhere to go after the club sometimes and an occasional homemade meal.

However, if a single man with no kids is dating a woman with kids, and wants to meet the kid almost as soon as they meet you, this man is a predator and wants access to your child. I can’t stress this enough.

I dated a guy recently who was hard pressed about meeting my daughter. I immediately grew suspicious and I began to pay more attention to his behavior. Obviously, I never let him meet my child but I did notice he only liked my daughter pictures on Facebook and none of mines. He asked if my daughter’s father was still in her life and I let him know that he is. He responded as if he was disappointed that my daughter’s father was still in her life, it was odd and I took it as an immediate red flag.

I had a sixth sense that he was a predator and confused about his sexuality. I cut ties with him because a normal man who was interested in me, would be relieved that my daughter’s father was still in her life because that means I am not looking for a father for my child, I’m looking for a man to be in a relationship with.

After several attempts of him asking to meet my daughter and me denying him access telling him I have to get to know him first and it may take at least a year or so for him to meet my child, he began to be distant with me and pull away.

He knew that it would be impossible to get easy and fast access to my child and I noticed he showed less interest in me, called and text me less often and became aloof.

I ended it with him, and I hope I left an impression to how strong, stealth and committed a single mother can be when it comes to protecting her child.

However, since he was predatory, he felt discouraged that her father was still in her life because that is an obstacle that would get in his way. It’s truly sickening.

Other men who are narcissistic won’t directly abuse your kids but they will sway you into becoming a bad parent by romanticizing you to spend more time with them instead of your kid.

They see your child as competition for your attention and they may lash out against your child if you are spending more time and attention on them. It may seem childish but I’ve experienced this and coached several women who have as well.

Some men who also have kids will date a woman with kids and keep a wall up between them at two separate families even after the engagement and married. A blended family can be a beautiful thing but some men are so hard pressed on who their kids are and who your kids are that they can’t quite grasp the concept of two families that aren’t biological coming together as one unit.

I’ve coached several women who have boyfriends with kids and they never feel like their boyfriend truly accepts their kid. They are cordial and nice to them but do not show a closeness that a step parent normally would.

This short article is a warning to single mothers that men are looking at you in predatory ways just because you are a single woman with a kid. They are making an assumption that you are weak, desperate and vulnerable.

There are countless Youtube videos with men degrading single mothers, justifying abusing them and using them and literally talk about them like they are stray dogs!

As a single, divorced mother, I am vigilant in protecting myself and my child from the predatory and manipulative men out there who see me as an easy target. I take pride in all means necessary to protect myself and my child and I am far from weak! I would like to educate women on the dangers of being a single mother and how to protect themselves and their child from men who have predatory intentions.

More to come on this, including a nationwide lecture, tour, and book.

Namaste

By Janell Hihi  Copyright@2017

The 4 Zodiac Signs That are Prone to be Narcissist

The psychology of narcissism fascinates me just as much as the ancient science of astrology. I’ve combined the two to give you a dose of “Astro-therapy.”

Yassss readers! I have compiled a list of the top Zodiac signs most likely to be narcissist despite their home environment or any other outside factors.

Let’s face it, some Zodiac signs are just natural born assholes. Thankfully, I’ve compiled this list so that you don’t have to learn the hard way like I did!

Narcissists can be very powerful. They must choose whether they want to use their power for good or evil. When the Zodiac signs below use their power for good, the world changes and human consciousness elevates. However, when they use it for evil the destruction they cause can be catastrophic.

First, let’s define what it means to be a narcissist:

A person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.

Below is a list of symptoms of narcissism according to the Mayo Clinic.

  • Having an exaggerated sense of self-importance
  • Expecting to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it
  • Exaggerating your achievements and talents
  • Being preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate
  • Believing that you are superior and can only be understood by or associate with equally special people
  • Requiring constant admiration
  • Having a sense of entitlement
  • Expecting special favors and unquestioning compliance with your expectations
  • Taking advantage of others to get what you want
  • Having an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others
  • Being envious of others and believing others envy you
  • Behaving in an arrogant or haughty manner
  • Violent
  • Driven by fame and greed
  • Cold, detached, inhumane.
  • Calculating, cunning and callous

If you’re wondering, No, I did not just describe a Leo in the bullet points above. Although it sounds like every aspect of their self-centered, grandiose, sun-ruled, attention-whore like characteristics.

Let’s get started with the list. The 4 zodiac signs most likely to be NARCISSIST:

#4 Most Narcissistic Zodiac Sign: TAURUS

Taurus manages to get themselves on every Zodiac shit-list that I construct.

My Moon sign is in Taurus so spare me the bias bullshit. I am talking about myself to a certain extent.

Taurus just can’t stay out of trouble. This is probably because the Taurus is the Symbolic age of a toddler in astrology and if you’ve ever been around a two-year-old, all you say repeatedly to them is “No,” “Get out of their,” and “You can’t have that!.”

Taurus Marry for Money: Melania Trump is a Taurus and she married Donald Trump. The only thing good about him is his tactless honesty and the zero’s in his bank account. Taurus treat their possessions like Gods. It’s no wonder this Taurus was able to look past Trump’s personality to cash in on his success.

Need help understanding why Donald Trump is the way he is? Read his complete birth chart to understand his unruly and unpredictable behavior.

A sense of entitlement: Like toddlers, most Taurus have a natural sense of entitlement. Hitler, one of the most famous Taurus, grew up torturing animals because he thought he was superior to them and he found torture entertaining…

Taurus truly believes that they deserve more than the average person. This belief gets them far in life because they are able to attract good luck, success, and wealth based on the belief that they deserve it.

However, it also get’s them in deep trouble because they feel entitled to lie, cheat, steal and manipulate others to get what they think, they are entitled to.

Taurus require a lot of attention in general but randomly opt to be alone at the most inconvenient times. Mainly, when you need them!

Dealing with a Taurus you need to understand that it is required that you are always there for them when they need you but it is not required that they are always there for you!

Inability to empathize: Many Taurus are prone to narcissism because it is hard for them to empathize with people. If they didn’t personally go through it, they won’t understand it. Period.

Daddy complex. Taurus men want to be your daddy not your man. They have an annoying, parental style love that wants to take care of you and tell you what to do…

Demonically Persuasive. Taurus has the ability to talk you into things you’d never imagine doing ever! They are the sales rep at the used car lot who sold you a lemon for thousands of dollars over it’s value. They are the boyfriend who tricks you into believing that having a threesome will take your relationship to the next level.

Taurus are the Jehovah witnesses that has you hipnotized and totally brainwashed, following their cult blindly!

The notorious cult leader Jim Jones is a Taurus. He lead a cult and successfully persuaded his loyal followers into commiting a mass suicide of over 918 people!

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Narcissistic Rage: Taurus are bullies and bullies are narcissist. A Taurus is not beneath hitting you or breaking shit to prove a point. Their tempers can lead them into violent rages which are often referred to toddler like tantrums or narcissistic, idiopathic rage. Taurus appear slow, calculating and relaxed but if you wave a red flag in their peripheral they will plow right through you.

Incredibly shallow and materialistic. Narcissist believes material possessions and the illusion of power is what make them happy.

They often use people to get what they want or spoil people, feeding on their desire for material things to manipulate them. The Taurus is either the sugar daddy or the damsel in distress who is milking her sugar daddy for every penny he has to offer.

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One of the biggest Pimps in American history “Iceberg Slim” is a Taurus! They can be womanizers and very successful at it. Taurus will tell you what it is, and what they want from you, so eloquently and disrespectfully, at the same time. They are deliberate and afraid of nothing!

Let’s not forget the famous Taurus, Madam and Politician Sally Stanford who said;

“Romance without finance is a nuisance. Few men value free merchandise.”

Taurus are extremist. Just examine their pedigree… Hitler and Saddam Hussein! If these two tyrants are narcissist to the extreme! They want power by any means.

Niccolo Machiavelli (born May 3, 1469) Though little more than a political brown-noser during his day, Machiavelli gained infamy for his survival guide for despots, The Prince, which set forth the rules of maintaining power through intimidation and unscrupulous cunning.

Taurus are Master Manipulators. Have you seen the movie “Catch Me If You Can,” starring Leonardo DiCaprio? It’s a true story about one of the world’s greatest con artist Frank Abagnale, a former confidence trickster, check forger, and impostor between the ages of 15 and 21.

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He became one of the most famous impostors ever, claiming to have assumed no fewer than eight identities, including an airline pilot, a physician, a U.S. Bureau of Prisons agent, and a lawyer. He escaped from police custody twice (once from a taxiing airliner and once from a U.S. federal penitentiary), before he was 21 years old.

He served less than five years in prison before starting to work for the federal government. He is currently a consultant and lecturer for the FBI academy and field offices. He also runs Abagnale & Associates, a financial fraud consultancy company.

Taurus are very cunning and manipulation and narcissism comes very easy to them because it is a part of who they are. You’ve been warned!


#3 Most Narcissist Zodiac Sign is VIRGO

Virgo’s are walking talking paradoxes. Dear Virgo’s how can you be powerful and insecure at the same time? Virgo’s are earth signs. If they wish, they can be very successful. Earth signs are manifestors and they typically make shit happen.

However, some of them are too self-destructive and narcissistic to ever see true success unless of course, it is stepping on the backs of everyone they know.

Virgos want you to be successful but not more successful than them, this is why the movie Horrible Bosses was inspired by an employee with a Virgo manager…

Narcissist secretly does not want you to succeed, neither does a Virgo.

Narcissists/Virgos are never satisfied with ANYTHING you do ever! They will find something wrong with everything you do and point it out without hesitation.

Virgos are detail oriented, but they pay attention to the WRONG details. They pay attention to IRRELEVANT details no one else pays attention.

If a Virgo is reading this now, they are angry and in total disbelief. Many narcissists cannot handle people calling them out neither can a Virgo. 

It is very easy to irritate a Virgo because they are so insecure. They get so easily annoyed, they probably won’t get past the 2nd paragraph of this blog without closing the browser.

Virgos make people feel like they are walking on egg shells. People find it hard to be themselves around Virgos because Virgos are too sensitive to take a joke and are easily annoyed by anything you do and say, just like narcissist.

Virgos have Political or money motivated agendas. Virgos are famous snipers who kill to manipulate politics and earn a huge payout. A famous Virgo, Charles J. Guiteau shot and killed President James Garfield.

Another Virgo on a killing spree with a political agenda is Eric Robert Rudolph, also known as the Olympic Park Bomber. He’s an American domestic terrorist convicted for a series of anti-abortion and anti-gay-motivated bombings across the southern United States

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Virgos live a double life like most Narcissist. Virgo’s, like Gemini’s, can be incredibly two faced. Most abusive male Virgos that I know are charming and very social outside of their home. They are respected and admired by many. However, at home, and behind closed doors, they are monsters to their wives and children.

Stubborn: Narcissist, like Virgo’s, never change their mind or consider others points of view.

You are only there to serve them: Your opinion doesn’t matter so stop talking.

Controlling: Virgo’s need you to be what they assigned you to be. As their lover, you have job responsibilities you must not falter from. Get on your job! No slacking or the berating and nagging will never end.

Easily irritated: They walk around like Ebenezer Scrooge, grumpy, tired and full of complaints.

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Possessive: You belong to them. You are a possession. They are insecure and jealous and they need to know where their possessions are at all times.

Virgos Can’t keep secrets. They are ruled by Mercury, never tell a person ruled by Mercury any of your secrets. They will put your business out there in the streest for entertainment purposes.

Judgemental: Virgos love to judge, especially people who are different from them in any way. Virgos are simple minded and they believe everyone should live their lives the same way. Diversity and change frightens them.

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Routined Robots: They hate being surprised and don’t you dare try to be spontaneous with them.

Neat Freaks. Most Virgos spend too much time cleaning and not enough time living. Everything has to be perfect according to the Virgo.

Insecure: Virgos are special because they act insecure and powerful at the same time. They are confident in one breath but then they say or do something that shows that they are also totally insecure and self-conscious. WTF?

They are psychoanalytical and too identified with the mind and the ego. They need to get in touch with their heart and their feelings!

Bottle up anger and then explode. When a Virgo unleashes everything they’ve bottled up, they are not verbal, they are physical and you might end up dead. Be very careful.

Virgos are Revengeful. Bad Girls Club star Tanisha Thomas let’s it be known how immature, reckless and vengeful she can be every minute of the show.

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Narcissistic Perfectionism: Virgos believe in the illusion of perfection which makes them absolutely unbearable to be around at times.

Michael Jackson a pyscho perfectionist. Beyonce’ another pyscho perfectionist. These people MUST be the best and when it comes to their careers, many of them are. Like a true narcissist their fame comes before everyone and everything in their LIFE.

Virgos often suffer from OCD and they believe EVERYTHING has its place. Even you! And your place is beneath them!

They need to THINK about everything and are slow to make decisions to the point where it tortures you and everyone involved! They have to think about what they will wear, where they want to eat, what they want for breakfast, blue socks or white socks, like really just make a fucking decision already! Geesh

Virgos will sell out for coins. They will sell out for prestigious positions. Ben Carson who is a Virgo is Donald Trumps bitch! Go Figure

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Most Virgos are condescending and talk to you like you’re a child in true Narcissistic fashion. Virgo’s astrological age is the adult, and they think they have authority over everyone including you.

Virgos think everything is permanent often confusing temporary emotional states with permanent characters traits.

Virgos are habitual but not progressive. They have strict routines but an inability to change to be progressive. This is why they are prone to narcissism!

Virgos make the list of the most Notorious Serial Killers – Check it out here!

When Virgos loosen up and give in into the fact that they are imperfect, they are quite gifted human beings with a sense of humor that is magnetic! Dave Chappelle is a Virgo, and when I tell you he is one of the funniest, most controversial comedians ever, that is an understatement!

Virgos will pick apart every little flaw you have effortlessly and with child like enthusiasm. They pay attention to everything negative about you, never the positive. This is why they are textbook narcissists.

Virgos’s can’t forgive themselves or others, ever! If they do something embarrassing or if someone hurts their sensitive little egos, they over analyze the situation and continue to relive it until it drives them absolutely insane.

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The 2nd Most Narcissistic Zodiac Sign is LEO

I was debating whether or not Leo should be number one but I gave them a pass because there is one more sign in the Zodiac more narcissistic than Leos, believe it or not!

Poor Leo, with an ego the size of their ruling planet which isn’t even a planet, it’s the sun… how can they NOT be narcissistic?

The sun is the life force of the Universe. Without it, we’d all be dead. Everything and every planet revolves around the sun.

The Leo truly believes the world revolves around them. The minute you stop stroking their egos and not making them the center of your world is the minute the Leo goes into a narcissistic rage!

Secretively Insecure: Leo’s brag a lot, they are known to be conceited but they manage to hide their insecurity very well behind their exaggerated self-confidence! I’m sure you’ve seen The Wizard of Oz The Lion without a heart is the perfect example of the tragedy that is the Leo!

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Selective Honesty: Just like a narcissist, Leo’s only share half truths and half stories. They are liars plain and simple. I’m certain the father of all lies, Satan was a Capricorn sun and a Leo moon because these people stay lying.

The sad part is they suck at lying. So, it’s pretty easy to see through their bullshit.

Leos are People who say ‘no offense but…’ just before saying something really offensive.

Leos are a slave to pleasure: They will do ANYTHING that makes them happy regardless of who they hurt. This is why they are born Narcissist!

Leos dangle carrots of hope in your face: Classis narcissist tactic, promise but never deliver! Leos are full of shit and never deliver on their promises. President Barack Obama promised the black community that voted him into office so much! But he only delivered on about 3% of what he promised. He has 1,000 excuses for why he couldn’t do anything for African Americans.

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They Demonize their exes: Leo’s demonize their ex to ensure the two of you never meet. Typically, the Leo was the one doing all the dirt but they will never admit that. They have to play the victim to gain your sympathy. It’s part of their deceptive, narcissistic charm.

Leos Love Bomb: Narcissist love bomb too! What a coincidence! Love bombing is being the women’s night in shining armor during an extended honeymoon phase. Buying her flowers, sending good morning and goodnight texts daily, phone calls twice a day, fun, expensive and adventurous dates… you name it! All to get you hooked on them so they can go in for the narcissistic kill!

If Leo’s are nice to you, best believe there is an agenda behind it to get something from you whether its sex, a relationship, money or an ego stroke, Leos attention comes with a price.

Cheap: Leos are financially tight-fisted, selfish and cheap. It’s not to save money, it’s to show you how they feel about you. A narcissist doesn’t believe that you deserve much if anything and as soon as the honeymoon phase is over, be prepared to hear them gripe and complain about money. Be prepared to open your wallet more than 50% of the time.

Selfish: They will never do ANYTHING for you without first weighing the benefit they stand in gaining from it. Doing things from their heart is not an option. Natural born narcissist!

They Brag. A Lot!: Leos love to hear themselves talk about themselves like true narcissist. Leo’s are either complete losers or complete winners. The Leo’s who are successful, you’ll never hear the end of it! The Movie Meet the Fockers is a great example of how narcissistic Leo’s love to brag about their careers and so-called humanitarian efforts. Watch!

Leos love to one-up people: Leo’s just can’t congratulate someone and move on. They find it hard not to be a hater in general so when you tell them good news about yourself, they tell you something about them that’s even more spectacular then what you just accomplished.

Leo’s philosophy – Life is a competition and they just gotta win. Regardless of the cost!

Leos are passive aggressive like most Narcissist. They don’t mean what they say and they don’t say what they mean. They communicate honestly only through their actions. They purposely ignore you, they don’t return your calls and they make jokes that are not funny at your expense to express their repressed aggression.

Sarcasm is their 2nd language. Leos gaslight as a first language. They always avoid the point of the conversation and deflect onto issues that revolve around you questioning your own sanity.

Leos love to answer every accusation with, “You’re crazy!”

Leos are clingy: They have to see you every day and talk to you or text you every hour. They smoother and suffocate you with attention and expect you to do the same to them.

Leos feel that they are superior to everyone just like most narcissist.

Leos are CONTROL freaks. Fidel Castro is the perfect example. They are tireless in their attempts to control everyone and everything. 

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“Fidel Castro promoted younger men only to discard them if they aspired openly to succeed him. Fidel was the inspirational leader, the man of action, the master strategist, the obsessive control-freak who micromanaged everything from hurricane preparedness to the potato crop. He was, above all, tireless. In marathon sessions, often beginning after midnight and ending after dawn, he would interrogate visitors about every facet of the political situation in their country.”

Leo’s need to know that they come before your kids. Leo’s want to see you put their needs before your child’s needs consistently to feel loved and supported. Narcissist look at kids as competition to gain your attention. It’s pretty sickening if you think about it.

Leo’s can’t be alone. They always NEED someone. Whether it’s someone to fuck, someone to talk to, someone to hang out at their house, someone to go to the damn grocery store with them, someone to watch them while they take a shit. They NEED someone all the time.

Leo’s will bargain with their life. Leo’s would rather die than be alone. If you were the one to leave them they may say they will kill themselves if you don’t come back.

However, if they leave you, bye bye! And don’t you dare come back unless you want to give them no strings attached sex and leave as soon as he’s finished with you. A Leo will pimp you if you let him, he will put you on a corner 1.5 seconds.

Leo’s discard you when there is no more benefit from being with you. Leos’s invented the discard because they invented narcissism.

Leos are walking talking contradictions. Leo’s never practice what they preach, they are the pope that is secretly a pedophile, the Civil Rights Movement leader who is a secret Klans man, the nun who preaches abstinence by day but is a pornstar by night.

Get a restraining order if you break a Leo’s heart. If you leave him while he is still in love with you or not finished using you, he will stalk you, harass you and even threaten you because he has NO self-control. He’ll even ask you to pay you back for all the dates he took you on and that time you used his car and didn’t put gas in it. Pathetic! It’s hard for Leos to believe anyone could leave them! So they don’t take your restraining order seriously either… Be safe and protect yourself.

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Covert & Overt Racist. Leo’s are either extremely Alt right or extreme Neo Liberals. The keyword is extreme. Narcissist are extreme, they cannot be well-balanced even when medicated by a psychologist. Tami Lahren is the newest generation of covert racist born on August 11th.

Pure example of how all Leos talk when they are passionate about their extreme ideologies that swirl around in their tiny little brains.

Leo’s preach constant narcissist rhetoric like “All lives matter,” and “I’m colorblind.” Leo’s look on the bright side only to cover up their darkside… they are completely and utterly UNREALISTIC. Jennifer Lopez is the classic Leo air head, read her tweet below.

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Leo’s have addictive personalities like Narcissist: They are addicted to alcohol, tattoos, weed, prescription drugs, anti-depressants, food, sex… you name it, their addicted!

Leos are narcissist, proceed with caution. Sad thing is, there is NO known cure for narcissism. So good luck, you’ll need therapy when your relationship is over!

#1 Most Narcissistic Zodiac is Capricorn

Selfish, sadistic, self-centered, egotistical, opportunistic, narcissistic Capricorns take the number one spot!

Narcissist quietly plot, just like Capricorns. They are conniving and strategic in their endeavors to attain money, status, and power!

Lack empathy. Capricorns don’t want to know your point of view, your feelings or what your going through. All they hear is their own voice, your feelings, wants and needs are irrelevant.

Capricorns are the supervillains with the most staying power. Deeply resentful of their inability to love or be loved by others, evil Capricorns apply themselves to an overall strategy of world domination.

Capricorns are slaves to money, status, titles and power.

The tarot card that represents the Capricorn is the devil. Need I say more?

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Being in a relationship with Capricorns requires you to sacrifice your life, your goals, your health, and your soul for the sake of submitting yourself to their mission.

It’s all about them! There ain’t no you! When you’re in love with a Capricorn you disappear and only they exist! Are you willing to completely lose yourself? If so, the Capricorn man is perfect for you.

Capricorn Quotes: “By any means necessary!”

Capricorns are too logical and not in touch with their hearts! They are too logical and cerebral. They rarely think with their hearts and this is why they are generally HEARTLESS people!

Capricorns literally judge a book by its cover. How something looks is more important to them then how someone actually is in the inside.

Capricorns won’t commit until the very end of dating, when you’ve had enough and ready to leave, that’s when they’ll commit. It’s an obligatory commitment that doesn’t feel real.

They won’t commit unless they have something to gain from you, a ride to work, a place to stay, sex on demand, money….

Two-faced & Disloyal. They will turn on you to cut a profit, get a promotion or win a bid that will financially benefit them. They will have no remorse! Capricorn, narcissistic logic is “It’s just business, never personal.”

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The most famous traitor in the world was a Capricorn by the name of Benedict Arnold. Benedict Arnold (1741-1801) was an early American hero of the Revolutionary War (1775-83) who later became one of the most infamous traitors in U.S. history after he switched sides and fought for the British.

Racism, classism, sexism and all the negative connotated isms are Capricorn philosophically derived ideologies that have literally ruined the world!

Saturn is the ruling planet of Capricorn, and Saturn rules systems and systems are killing off millions of people and disenfranchising nations all in the name of colonialism and capitalism.

Thankfully the age of Aquarius is dawning and these systems will be torn down to pieces.

Capricorns, if awakened and conscious can help change the world in a positive way. However, it is their obsession with power that they need to overcome to meet their salvation.

Extreme Opportunist: Capricorns are high paid whores. They will sleep with you for money for the right price or the right promotion.

Capricorns are stuck in the past. They are NOT progressive people. They only wish to maintain the laws, rules, and cultures of the past to ensure humanity does not evolve into something better.

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Rush Limbaugh is a Capricorn, I’ll just leave that there…

They will sell their bodies, their soul and even their children for fame, fortune, stardom, and power. 

Capricorns always go too far for success. They go too far to achieve wealth and status. They need power like they need water and oxygen and that is the epitome of everything a narcissist is!

Capricorns are Ambitious, Hardworking, and The Stickler For Rules.

They follow rules and laws and systems without questioning whether the rules, laws and systems are even humane!

Capricorns are loyal, but they are loyal to the wrong things! They are loyal to power!

Capricorns are Superior, Snobbish and Aloof. They are aloof until money or power is involved then all of a sudden you have their full and undivided attention.

They lack empathy like most narcissist and they never feel sorry for anyone, not even themselves. Capricorns beat themselves up behind closed doors and they typically suffer from low self-esteem. They keep their insecurities hidden so you’ll never know their weakness.

They will kill you if it advances their career. The president of North Korea killed his own brother to earn his current title. Talking about heartless and scandalous! He also launches test missiles as a cherished hobby.

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Capricorns show their love by buying you things and taking you to expensive places. They rarely compliment you, unless they can get something out of it. They hardly ever tell you they love you, they’d rather buy you a designer handbag and then leave in the middle of your anniversary dinner date to go back to the office and finish a proposal.

Dating a Capricorn is like dating someone in the military.

Shape shifters: they are fake and will mirror you, act like they have the same interest and hobbies just to carry on an agenda to get something from you.

Capricorns are boring! Hanging out with them is like watching paint dry! Unless they are doing something that really interests them! Of course, when that happens, they are so involved in the activity they forget you are there.

Capricorns marry brainless trophy wives who they can control with money.

A Capricorn see’s women who are intelligent and independent as too much of a challenge. They don’t want an intellectual match, they wany a submissive doormat who will tolerate their narcissistic abuse.

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American Billionaire Howard Hughes was a Proud born, tirelessly ambitious American billionaire who was once kicked out of a hotel in Vegas, and as a response in true Capricorn fashion, he bought the hotel just to prove to them:

“No one kicks out a Capricorn.” A Capricorn will literally buy you and one of their favorite lines is, “Everyone has a price!”

Capricorns are intuitive: They know how to sniff out fear and weakness within you and use it to exploit you for anything you have that can benefit them.

Cold as a corpse: Capricorns are cold people, born in the dead of winter, they have no feelings! They are also as rigid as a skeleton.

Capricorns are Snitches: they get people locked up!

Alpha personality: Capricorns demand you make them your priority or they won’t even deal with you.

Capricorns are Corrupt: J. Edgar Hoover, a sadisitic and evil Capricorn, was the first FBI Director was the most corrupt federal agent ever, killings thousands, framing many and setting up systems and traps of racism, harassment and mockery of African Americans including the Civil Rights Movement and the black panther party.

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FBI spied on MLK religiously. The FBI used some of this information obtained from spying to break into one of King’s hotel rooms and recorded evidence of an extramarital affair.

Afterward, they sent a letter to King directly, claiming they would blackmail him and implying they would leak the information if he didn’t commit suicide in the next 34 days.

The FBI  Director Edgar Hoover told King, “You are done. There is but one way out for you. You better take it before your filthy, abnormal fraudulent self is bared to the nation.”

Capricorns invented scandals. Let’s not talk about President Nixon and the Watergate Scandal. He was the first and only president to Resign as president after he was exposed for manipulative and cunning conspiracies.

They ALWAYS have something up their sleeves.

I know a Capricorn female who calls my sister for advice asking her, “How can I get guys to buy me things and pay my bills?” It’s really quite pathetic how ruthless they are.

Slaves to Lust. Like most narcissist, all Capricorns are slaves to lust. They can’t turn down a good time even at the risk of them being exposed and losing millions of dollars in advertisement endorsements.

If a Capricorn is breathing, they are cheating on you. They are skilled cheaters who come home every night but somehow manage with their excellent time management skills to sneak in an affair during a 15 minute break at work.

The narcissist never think they’ll get caught cheating. However, they always do eventually! You’ve heard about the infamous Capricorn Tiger Woods scandal, right?

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Actor, comedian and talk show host Steve Harvey ex-wife is suing him for murdering her soul… because he probably did. Most narcissists take every virtue from you and suck you dry, leaving you on the side of the road to die!

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Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Proceed with caution and understand if you plan on dating, getting into a business deal or starting a friendship with any of the above Zodiac signs, you are out of your Goddamn mind.

They are all prone to Narcissistic Tendencies naturally.

Stay safe out there…

By Janell Hihi Copyright@2017

Narcissist Communication Style: Deflection, Gaslighting & The Silent Treatment.

narc communicate

Narcissists don’t talk, or communicate: they fend off, hide and evade” Sam Vaknin

Have you ever called a guy you were dating to share some very exciting news?

When he answers the phone he’s excited to hear from you. However, when you share with him your excitement for landing a book deal, or getting that promotion at work, suddenly his tone changes. He’s no longer excited, instead, he is disinterested and bored!

A narcissist doesn’t care about anything significant in your life. It’s torture to even have to listen to anything you do that is outside of your relationship with them.

You are nothing but an extension of them and if you’re not adoring them, praising them, or making plans to see them, they don’t care about what your rambling about.

Some narcissist will even make up a reason to abruptly end the phone call with you as soon as you tell them the good news. This is their passive-aggressive way to tell you that you don’t matter. Instead of saying,”Congratulations, let’s get together sometime this week and celebrate!” The narcissist will respond by saying, “oh, okay!” Then quickly change the subject to something that revolves around them.

This is a covert, and passive-aggressive way to tell you that you are still insignificant to them, despite your accomplishments.

Other narcissists will respond, “Oh, good for you!” Which basically means they want you to stop talking about yourself and start talking about them or your relationship.

Narcissist Dismiss Everything you say that is not about them as “Trivial.” Even if you just left a funeral and your grieving a loved one. They don’t want to hear your sad stories.

Below are 5 communication techniques Narcissist use to reduce you:

#1. They cut you off mid-sentence. A narcissist won’t let you finish a complete sentence because, in their self-centered little world, everything they have to say is more important than listening to you finish a thought. There is a difference between talking to a hyper person who is excited to exchange dialogue with you who cuts you off and a narcissist who cuts you off to change the course of the conversation and make it about them. Example: You are telling the narcissist about a difficult co-worker at your job and they cut you off in the middle of your story and begin to tell you a story about a job they had in the past with difficult co-workers.

#2. They begin to multi-task when you start talking. Since the narcissist finds no value in listening to you unless you’re talking about them, they start to multi-task while your speaking. They do this by getting on their cell phone, updating statuses on social media, texting friends or watching TV as you try to communicate to them something important to you. Again, this is a passive aggressive way to tell you that they don’t care about anything you have to say, ever!

#3. Narcissist Repeat themselves often & Talk in Circles. The narcissist never has anything new to say because a narcissist doesn’t like to think outside of the box. They run on an internal and predictable script and they respond to things with the same dialogue quite often. They tell the same stories over and over again. They don’t care how many times you’ve heard it, they tell the story like they are telling it for the very first time. The story is about them being a hero or a victim depending on what kind of reaction the narcissist needs from you at that particular time. This shouldn’t come as a surprise because self-centered people are not good conversationalist. This is because they only engage in mutual dialogue when the conversation revolves around them.

#4. Avoids Conversations that Involve Confrontation. Since most narcissists are passive-aggressive, when you try to talk to them about something they did or said to hurt you, they try to avoid that conversation by any means necessary. They often say, “I can’t talk about it right now because… I’m busy, I have a headache or I’m tired.” They will keep making excuses not to talk to you to avoid being called out.

The narcissist doesn’t participate in real conversations with people to avoid intimacy, understanding, and problem solving that effective communication in relationships requires. If it is not a superficial conversation, the narcissist will do his/her best to avoid it.

#5. Deflects blame unto you. The narcissist will use reverse psychology to blame everything you accuse them of doing on you! Gaslighting is also put into the mix as you begin to feel like you are the crazy one because the narcissist keeps saying you are making things up in your head. Every conversation that involves you confronting the narcissist on an issue will leave you questioning your own sanity because they are so good at gaslighting and deflecting blame.

Below are a few examples of gaslighting and deflection in conversation:

“I cheated because you know how important sex is to me and you were purposely withholding it from me.”

“I hit you because you made me hit you. I kept telling you I didn’t want to talk and you kept talking.”

“I’ll help you fix your car this time, but your an adult. I want a woman who is independent who doesn’t need anything from me because she can do it herself.”

“If you can’t come over tonight, it just goes to show how much you really love and care about me.”

“I stood you up yesterday because I knew if I would of went to the event with you, I would have been miserable the whole time because you’re always accusing me of things I don’t do.”

“You’re paranoid.”

“You are crazy.”

“I don’t do relationship titles”

“I didn’t answer your phone call last night because I didn’t want to argue with you. I needed a break, you’re always nagging me and giving me a hard time.”

“I’m not ready to take the next step in our relationship until you stop being negative and starting arguments with me.”

“I am not your ex-lover, I won’t cheat on you. Stop blaming me for your exes mistakes.”

In closing, real conversations with a narcissist will never take place. They avoid confrontation or deflect and gaslight their ways out of tough conversations that are necessary for the survival of your relationship.

By Janell Hihi Copyright@2017

Stealing Light: The Cycle of Narcissism

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There are two types of narcissist, the conscious and unconscious. Those who are consciously aware of their evil and destructive pathology, and those who are not aware of their vile and destructive behavior. The unconscious narcissist is completely oblivious to his own condition whereas the conscious narcissist is deliberate and calculating.

Both conscious and unconscious narcissist are equally destructive.

Victims of abuse and neglect can become narcissist and the cycle of abuse is repeated. A few months ago I seen the movie Split. It’s a thriller about a psychopath who suffered psychologically trauma as a child. He developed multiple personality disorder and kidnapped a few girls. His rage from his abuse was left untreated for too long and he was so enraged evil and demonic entities entered him.

Abuse opens up a gateway and evil is released through vile behavior acted out by human beings.

More than likely, the unconscious narcissist was abused by a caregiver or a stranger and when the abuse took place, their light was stolen by the abusive and predatory narcissist who took something from the victim without permission.

Violators steal light. 

They charge through others boundaries like a raging bull who see’s red. They believe they are empty inside because someone took something from them at a very young and tender age. They were not able to defend themselves and there was no one around to save them when the abuse took place.

Statistically, the judicial system fails to protect victims of abuse and more than likely justice is never served. This creates, even more, fear, hatred, anger and powerlessness within victims of abuse.

As a result, the victims feel an internal deficit. They are dim and in search of the light that was taken from them. 

The only way they feel they can obtain the light that they lost is by stealing it from others because that is how it was taken from them. Once they begin stealing light from others, the high is similar to a drug addict getting his fix.  When justice is not served on behalf of victims within our judicial system, anger festers and it is transmuted into resentment. Resentment seeks vengeance

Resentment seeks vengeance and initiates the cycle of abuse. If the narcissist who was abused doesn’t have children of their own to abuse, they will abuse others. They will seek out the vulnerable and they have a sixth sense in identifying them because they remember how it felt being vulnerable, powerless and an easy target of abuse. They like to work in schools, daycares, old folks homes or with people who have disabilities.

Narcisssist seek out single mothers to target and abuse their children. Every part of their life is set up to be in close proximity of people who are vulnerable, naive and full of life force, positive energy that narcissist can extract.

Untreated victims of abuse whose violators were never punished seek revenge. They morph into what they hate, an abuser! This is not the case for all victims of abuse, but it is true for some. An endless cycle of abuse is created and child abuse and spousal abuse continues it’s dreadful saga.

The powerless need to derive power from others by abusing them. This is true in every aspect of reality. If you’ve ever had a narcissistic manager, which I am certain you have because narcissist seeks careers in management and law enforcement where they can exercise power and dominance over others daily.

Narcissistic managers have a past. They have a story of abuse and victimization. Something happened to them that stole their light and now they make it a priority to extract light from you in every way possible the entire duration of your shift at work.

Being an empath, every time I am in the presence of a narcissist, I see right past their abusive behavior and I see a scared and defensive child, seething in the pain of neglect, abuse, abandonment and anger. I sympathize with the innocence that was stolen from them immediately. However, I no longer let my sympathy allow them to steal my light.

I have strong boundaries narcissist cannot break. I do not allow my smpathy towards them to enslave me into a savior role. I know that I cannot save them. However, I do know that I can point them in the right direction towards healing.

Every victim of abuse who turns narcissist needs to learn and practice the ancient art of mental transmutation.

“Mind may be transmuted, from state to state; degree to degree; condition to condition; pole to pole; vibration to vibration. True Hermatic Transmutation is a mental art.

Turning pain into power is your only refuge. It’s the only way to recognize your light is infinite and it was never stolen, you were forced to believe it was.

Instead of allowing the narcissist to steal my light, I give it to them willingly. This means before they try to extract it from me, I send healing and positive energy to them. Burglars who are greeted at the door of the house they’ve been plotting to rob with gifts would be immediately neutralized of their desire to steal. In subtle ways, I let the narcissist know that I am intuitively aware that they are suffering.

I invite them to like my “Kids Lives Matter,” page on Facebook, I let them know that I advocate for abused children. I speak to the broken child within them and do not allow their charm or persuasive ways to manipulate me or alter the course of my life.

I know that they can’t steal my light if I do not allow it! I trust my intuition and I am guided by my instincts. Therefore, I am not able to be used as an accessory to the narcissist. 

I protect the vulnerable. I protect my child from predatory influences, I protect my light not by hiding or protecting it, but by giving it freely to those who have been dimmed and robbed of their own.

I am a radiating fountain of endless light and those who need it can absorb it. If you know you are a source of infinite good will, you will know that your light can never, ever be taken! Other’s may try to steal from it but the flow never stops. Your soul is self-replenishing and it replaces the light that is stolen. I guess what I am here to tell victims of abuse is, they didn’t steal your light, you are not dim, you are an infinite fountain flowing with light and that belief allows you to heal from abuse.

The abuser’s goal was to disconnect you from infinite flow and infinite source by planting the seed of worthlessness, lack and deficit within your being. Pull that seed from the dirt and do not allow it to flower. It’s a lie!

Being replenished with light starts with a simple belief and that is; your divinity can never be depleted, to begin with.

Your light is still there. Stop the cycle of narcissistic abuse.

By Janell Hihi

Copyright@2017

An Analysis of Janet Jackson’s Failed Marriage & The Dark-side of Interracial Dating.

Speaking from a very similar experience, my ex-husband is Arab (Except the billionaire part) I knew this marriage was doomed from the start.

There’s something about African-American women that attracts men who are obsessed with conquering women who exhibit independence, strong will and an attitude that takes no shit from anyone trying to come for her…

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The obsession from this type of man is provoked by a strong desire to conquer strong women and break them. Break their will, their strength, and independence. Turning an independent woman, dependent is the ultimate high and the narcissist dream come true. It’s similar to how a hunter seeks to shoot wild animals. It’s something about making the free and wild submit and surrender either by servitude or death that gets them off.

In addition, I am certain Wissam is a long-time fan of Janet Jackson and the iconic Jackson family. To him, this is a fantasy come true. Marriages based on fantasy never last…

The euphoria that comes with getting a woman to submit who is fiercely independent is similar to how drug addicts feel when they finally get a hit of whatever drug they are hooked on.

Interracial relationships are slightly fetish based despite those who deny it and say it’s 100% love, I’m here to state the facts! As a bi-racial woman, I am certain my African American father was extremely attracted to my German-Dutch mother mostly because her father was extremely racist.

My father is almost 80 years old. He has had a fair share of unfair, demeaning and insulting experiences at the hands of white men. I’ve heard the heart-wrenching stories that anger me until this day. My father felt he would enact the best revenge he could on a white man which is to marry and breed with his daughter.

My mother who was mistreated by her father because of her learning disability, also had a hatred and resentment for her father that she shared with her husband. They both had hatred and disdain for white men, and that was the magnetism that made their attraction unbreakable.

I believe Janet Jackson was attracted to Wissam’s billionaire status and success. I also believe she was attracted to him because he is non-black. The majority of Janet’s husbands were non-black and this is because of her dysfunctional childhood.

Janet’s father made fun of his children’s black features. I remember he said to the late Michael Jackson as a child that his knows was wide like a bell pepper. This is why Michael Jackson had an on-call plastic surgeon. His childhood environment taught him that black was ugly. 

Of course, people who hate themselves are more likely to date outside their race. Dating within their race creates a mirror. A person with low self-esteem can’t stand to be with a person that reflects who they are.

Janet Jackson wanted an experience outside her own culture and race because she felt her race and culture was somewhat inferior. The euphoria of being “Chosen” by a man outside her race and culture validates her self-worth. The fact that he is a billionaire makes her feel even more special because he can have any woman but he chose her!

This is what I like to refer to as a karmic relationship. Both Janet and Wissam had to get this out of their system. Wissam, having everything he could dream of in his grasp needed a challenge. Janet presented him with the best opportunity to transform something wild into something tamed and submissive.

Janet’s karma was simple. She needed to be reminded that being herself and embracing who she is racially and culturally should be celebrated not negated. Janet want’s another life, a different existence. It wasn’t until the end of this marriage she realized that she would rather be herself. This experience will help Janet embrace who she is. It will help her love who she is. Now that she knows what it feels like to be transformed into someone else, she won’t ever try to escape herself again.

She will also realize the beauty of having cultural and racial similarities in relationships. It was time for her to learn that different isn’t always better. The karmic books are now balanced. Well, at least I hope so. Janet is 50 years old.

A 50-year-old single mother? I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. However, she thought money was important in choosing a husband and she found out the hard way. A billionaire doesn’t guarantee a good father or a good husband. This is another lesson she learned.

Culture Shock on top of racial differences creates several obstacles.

It’s one thing dating outside your race. It’s another thing dating outside of your culture. The reason American white woman and American black man have lasting marriages like my parents married 50 years now! Is because they are both American. Yes, they come from different sides of the track. One being from the oppressive majority and the other from the oppressed minority, they celebrate the same holidays, speak the same language, share similar faiths and live in the same country.

Islam however, is starkly different than American culture, especially black American Culture. Islam enslaved Africans just like Europeans did and they share the same racial and cultural biases as the most Europeans who have deeply internalized on a subconscious level, horrific stereotypes, and ideas that are demeaning towards black people.

Black woman in Islam were never wives. Most of the times they were whores and concubines. They objectified black woman and were sickening fascinated with our body parts, hair texture, and dominant attitudes. They don’t like us and have spent centuries trying to change us. Hence the attitude of the colonizer. He wants to take land and convert people to their culture and their religion.

Any American dating a Muslim knows in order for it to work out in the long term she will have to convert to Islam. Are you willing to give up who you are to be loved? Becoming a Muslim is forfeiting your life and transforming into a different entity. It’s not for the weak at heart. You have to be willing to sacrifice yourself. They wish to fetishize black woman, not to love and respect them for who they are.

Arabs treat blacks very poorly in their countries. Check out the video below. They are very oppressive and racist towards Africans. It’s wicked and psychotic.

 

When the high wears off, the lows in a marriage is hard to survive.

This is when most fetish based married couples head toward the exits. The high wore off and the low is a mutha-fuckah! The marriage is more like a conquest than a thriving, morally sound relationship. I knew it was an inevitable end. I wish Janet and her child the best and I hope that more black woman is aware of the pros and the cons of interracial and intercultural marriages.

Take Heed.

By Janell Hihi

Copyright@2017